It all began with a silly question...

2:10 AM

Andre: oit

tak tido lagi ka?

me: thats a silly question to ask, isn't it? i mean, if i was sleeping, would i be replying???

thats right, you silence confirms it

Andre: now that reply is valid if you were to reply while i was typing

me: ah.

so i answered by, how do i say it, the process, of answering. i ultimately answered your question as i was typing it? is that what you're saying?

Andre: nope, your answer would be valid by replying before the question is asked. Isnt it? i mean you did reply that by replying you are not asleep and my questions is invalid as thus sound silly

me: no no. my reply was not a reply to your question. my reply was merely an action taken in response to your inquiry. had I answered 'yes', that would have been a reply.

however, i did not answer with a 'yes'.

Andre is typing a message

i answered with a retort stating how silly your question was.

Andre is typing a message

in essence, my reply was not a reply.

Andre is typing a message

my reply was a non-reply to a question that wasnt a valid question.

Andre is typing a message

as you are typing your response.

Andre is typing a message

i have disconnected.

Andre is typing a message

Qiddas has disconnected.

Andre: replies are not limited to conformation and you did reply with a question of cynical nature to the point of asking the question.

chicken.

Andre's new status message - Effing A. Woke up to a mind fuck discussion and now im hungry

me: however, i was in invisible mode.

my invisible mode was, in actuality, a ccccccccombo breaker

not only have i won an epic win, i have also dominated your soul.

i have gone visible again. i am awesome.

me: you have left without acknowledging my statement. you bloody bastard.

So I got a new chair.

'Hello, could you direct me to your shop please?' I asked the guy over the phone.

'Yes, you see pizza hut, you go straight, you turn left. Our shop number 34.'

'34, you say? Thank you,' I said and 2 seconds later, we got lost. Twice. Syed was driving. I was the navigator and I was crap.

But in the end, we didn't get to THE second hand shop in TTDI but we did get to A second hand shop in TTDI.

For years have I been using a plastic chair-the kind you find at mamak stall, weddings, school gatherings, funerals- you know the type? the one with the one basic template to rule them all?

Well, ladies and gentlemen, I have bought a second hand chair and I'm loving it.

Now, questions come to mind when buying 2nd hand stuff. The following seven are the ones that I could think of as I am writing this:

1) Has anyone accidentally peed on this chair?

2) Was the result of said pee the reason why the chair was sent off to a 2nd hand furniture shop?

3) Should I worry about getting STD's should I feel the need to sit naked on this chair. Like I'm doing now.

4) How do I wash a chair? Note that the chair is upholstered in cloth.

5) Do I put it in the washing machine? If it does not fit, should I take the wheels off?

6) Should I get off the chair while it, sans wheels, is in the washing machine?

7) I do not own a washing machine. Is my neighbour angry at me because I did not take the wheels off? Why is he threatening to call the police? He must calm down. I am his neighbour. He does not own the washing machine. His wife does.

I will never know the answers to these questions. But let it be known that this is an awesome chair. And I hope it is not possessed. Like that bastard Herbie car.

Fuck that volks.

Buzzcut ftw!!

Went to the barber the other day. Got me a buzzcut. Man it feels good.

If you were wondering, fotographico's my picture-taking company. It's pretty awesome.

My apparent personality.

See my Personality Profile

I think I shall.

Hair.

That's right. Hair.

It's that black stuff on your head that grows outta your scalp for reasons that nobody knows.

Okay, maybe it makes you look more unique than the other guy/chick. I mean, did you know that mirrors were probably invented because of hair? True probable fact.

'Man, seriously, this black shit on my head is pissing me off. Dude, seriously, how do I look?' he would ask a random stranger.

The stranger would say, 'Seeing as that I don't even know you and do not know how you would react if I were to give you an honest answer, I will tell you this -'

And the guy, who was not only smart but extremely impatient would say, 'You know what? Fuck you. I'm gonna invent a mirror.' And he did. Out of wood. As it turns out, he wasn't smart at all. He was as dumb as a brick. In fact, to call him as dumb as a brick was an insult to all bricks around the world, who had bachelors degrees in Being A Wall.

Okay, that rant was pretty useless, I know. I wanted to post something on hair and wanted to be all smart with it and all that I got was some stupid story.

These past couple of years, ever since I've moved to KL, I've been losing hair. That's right. If I just combed through with my fingers, I would get probably a couple of loose strands clinging between my fingers.

Now that goes double for the hair on my head...

So I've decided to go all army and shit and get myself a buzz-cut tomorrow. Why? I don't know. I guess I'm just tired of seeing hair all over my keyboard, my floor, my sink, my bed, my toilet, in my food- EVERYWHERE!

I also bought this anti hair-fall shampoo thats supposed to prevent hair-loss and I figured, I'll just level the playing field and give them hair roots (follicles. thats a fancy schmancy way of saying hair roots) a fair start at growing. That's the plan anyways.

But the question thats bugging me is... is my hair-fall caused by something I ate? Is it genetic? Did someone put a spell on my scalp? Are aliens invading earth and the hairfall is just my hair's way of saying, 'OhfuckOhfuckOhfuckTHEY'RE HERE!' ?

We will never know. But theres a little voice in me that keeps bugging and saying, 'You're growing old, Qiddas.' and part of me sooo wants to punch that voice in the face. Because the truth is... most probably... true. Hair raising, no?

I have removed the navbar!

Win!

An important promise...

me: dude
Cousin: yo
me: can i tell you something...
Cousin: can
me: but dont tell anyone
Cousin: no prob
me: promise?
Cousin: promise. u nak kawin?
me: no.. this is much more important.
Cousin: hehe
me: you promise?
Cousin: promise
me: ok.. i need to take a dump.
Cousin: wont tell any1. that's much more important than kawin definitly!
me: damn straight yo! imma send a very nasty message to the ninja turtles
Cousin: they'd probably eat it yo!
me: dont be silly. they eat pizzas. please be guided accordingly, tq.later man. remember, you promised.
Cousin: dont b silly. promises r made to b broken. tq
me: DAMN!